I listened to the affirmations for birthing track on repeat.

First baby I was diagnosed with preeclampsia at 40+3, induced that afternoon and went through 12 hours labour before ending in emergency Caesar. I had an epidural because the pain of the induction drip was too strong, got to 6cm but then deemed a failure to progress and baby was born in the theatre. I was extremely traumatised by the process, had done hypnobirth course online and not been prepared for the interventions.

 

Baby #2 Daphne - difficult pregnancy with an umbilical hernia and gestational diabetes. I was healthy throughout the pregnancy with diet and walking as that’s all I could do for exercise. I started acupuncture at 38 weeks to try and encourage natural spontaneous labour. I had sessions every 3 days and afterwards, I had some contractions that would ease off by morning and then come irregularly through the following days. At 39+5 I had more regular contractions coming, and had sex at 3 pm then had regular strong contractions every 2-3 minutes. I started losing my mucus plug over the day and they were so painful I went to the hospital. They checked and said I was only 1cm dilated, to try and rest. I listened to the "affirmations for birthing" track on repeat.

 

I stayed in the birth suite but couldn’t sleep as the surges were so strong and every 2 minutes. I used gas all night, got in the shower, used the bath as well but the surges were still coming hard and fast. I was so emotional and tired from a whole night of no sleep. When they checked in the morning after a whole night of labour I was only 2cm dilated. They then told me I should go home and try to labour there as much as I could due to lack of progress or they could admit me to the maternity ward where I could have panadeine but no gas.

 

Apparently, someone was coming in to be induced so I was getting kicked out of the birth suite whilst in labour. I was hysterical from the pain and lack of sleep, crying and nearly hyperventilating stating I couldn’t do this at home. They told me to sit in the waiting room while they prepared my admission to maternity ward. Leaving me alone to cry hysterically in agony and fear.

 

After a while they came in and I begged for an epidural because the pain was too strong. I had no chance to rest with surges being so close together. I couldn’t believe my body was working all night so hard and did virtually nothing! AGAIN!! I was heartbroken. They took me to the assessment room and put me on a ctg. They told me I couldn’t have an epidural until I was 3cm and I was only 2cm. I requested morphine as I needed something to take away the pain, at this stage I was considering having a repeat caeser as I just wanted it all to be over. Thankfully the midwife came onto duty and talked me down from hyperventilating, I was able to breathe through my surges even though I struggled. She kept reminding me to focus only on the hypnobirth track.

 

After a while a team of doctors came in and told me that the ctg showed my baby’s heart rate was dipping with each surge and they were worried about her. They wanted to get me into the operating theatre within the hour for a repeat caeser. By this time my partner had arrived at the hospital and we talked it over and decided both baby and I were obviously too distressed by the whole process and needed a quick resolution.

 

At 11.21am on 18/2/21 little Daphne was delivered via caeser. She was coated in meconium when they took her out and it was sticky and old, they said could have even been up to a week old. So it turns out she was quite distressed and if we hadn’t made the call then she might not be with us. I’m certainly glad I didn’t go home like they suggested initially! During the operation my hypnobirth track was playing on repeat to help me stay calm.

 

After she was out I felt like things were taking longer than last time and I got worried. The doctors told me that I would be feeling a lot of pressure and they were pushing around my chest hard. It turns out I haemorrhaged and lost 500ml blood during the operation which must have been what they were trying to fix.

 

Overall I’m glad that we chose to go with the caeser. I don’t know what happened with my body but it wasn’t ready to birth either baby. I am happy that I have 2 healthy babies earth side.

 

Kai Crystal